5/14/10

Vanity

I had a dream and thought about vanity and this video afterwards...

I had a dream last night and I think it was about vanity. I don't know if it was a God-given dream or what, and I don't take dreams too seriously, but I definitely felt like there was something good that I got out of it.
I don't remember every detail or even the order of the scenes, but I'll try to remember the best I can. The dream starts off in a sort of restaurant, diner type of place. I am talking to a couple of women, one of them older and the other younger. The older woman talks about a certain cream that you can put on your face that wipes away the vanity. I think that's definitely different. I decide to try some of that. I take the bottle and think to myself that it will make me look better. It is a dark colored cream, a sort of brownish color. I put it on and it feels like putting lotion on, but after a while it feels like it's stretching my face, a tightness I guess. Then, I start to see the effects of it on my face. My heart begins to sink as I see what it's done to my face. Some of my skin has disappeared off of my face to make it look closer to the skeleton, tho not completely. It's still mostly skin and flesh. Where I would have spots (breakouts) is the worse and also my nose looks like the skeleton version with just a thin layer of skin. I immediately try to cover this up with make-up. It feels like I spend about an hour doing this. Finally, the younger woman comes into the restroom and starts talking to me. Eventually, we are outside and she tells me that I'm not beautiful and a couple of other things (this scene might have happened first, but I don't remember). I feel really bad about what she said. Then, I turn around and think to myself, "God calls me beautiful" and I told her that I don't believe what she said, and that I am beautiful. I wasn't necessarily thinking about looks when I said that, but the acceptance of myself as being beautiful as God calls me beautiful. Then, later on I am in a dining hall with the young woman. There are round tables that have white table clothes. There is a group of young people in there. We are all eating dinner. Even though I feel stuffed, I still have a couple pieces of bread from the pasta meal. Most everyone is done eating and they just start to leave. I decide to finish eating those last pieces. I feel like a blob doing that, but oh well. Then, after almost everyone is gone and I'm finished eating, we are given an entirely new dish by one of the servers and it's looks like a sort of healthy casserole of some type. It looks green. Now realizing that we have this new meal that is better than the first, the young woman says something about how we all should have waited and then we would have all had this, but most everyone missed out. She said "tisk tisk." So, I felt like I had done something good by staying there for so long afterwards. That's pretty much all that I remember from the dream.
When I woke up from the dream, I felt like maybe the dream is about vanity. Physical looks are vain because they don't last. Outward beauty doesn't last. Youth doesn't last. The only thing that can last is our character, what's in our heart. Instead of focusing so much on our outward looks, we should focus more on our characteristics. I think the turning point in the dream for me is when I realized how vain my face is and that it's my characteristics that truly make me who I am: my strength, positivity, friendliness, faith, frugality and patience. It's not really my outward beauty that makes me beautiful, but my inward beauty, the very fact that God calls me beautiful is the only true reason that I'm beautiful. It doesn't matter what I say or anyone else says, but what God says. He's the one that really counts in all of this. And I'm also thinking of a few Bible quotes (1 Samuel 16:7, Proverbs 31:30 & Isaiah 53:2): "Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart" & "Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised" & (a prophecy referring to how most people would look at Jesus when He was on earth) "There was nothing beautiful or majestic about his appearance, nothing to attract us to him" (and this is Jesus we're talking about, the King of Kings, the most perfect beautiful human being ever; but apparently on the outside he wasn't so impressive to most people of the time).

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